Couples Counseling

Here's the reality: relationships are difficult. The best ones take time and effort, forever.

We aren't really taught how to have healthy relationships; we make it up as we go, doing our best based on what we saw growing up and what we did in other relationships. For most people, it could always be better.

It's never "too soon" to get couples counseling, but it can definitely be "too late."

Seeking professional help to learn how to create and maintain healthy relationships is incredibly smart. Couples counseling can help with a variety of common issues: communication, trust, connection, intimacy, resolving disagreements, finances, and parenting.

Couples counseling can also help with less "traditional" situations, including: infidelity, break ups/separation/divorce, expanding the family, non-monogamy, combining two families, cultural differences, and infertility stress.

Specializations

It is strongly recommended that anyone seeking couples or family therapy work with an LMFT - a Licensed Marriage & Family Therapist. This is a state-level licensure that ensures the clinician has the appropriate schooling, experience, testing, and supervision to ethically and competently work with various family systems, couples included.

Gottman Training:

Many clients look for someone who is "Gottman Certified," mainly because the Gottman Institute does a great job of marketing and writing books for clients. While this is a good starting point for working with couples, Gottman training alone does not make someone competent to work with couples.

The Gottman Method is not as proven in research as others (see JMFT analysis), and ethical couples work draws from numerous couples counseling and family therapy methods, which takes a specialized master's degree to cover.

Every LMFT has basic Gottman exposure from school, and often 1-2 levels of certification. As a client, it is more beneficial to focus on the LMFT license than the Gottman certification.

Some couples counseling issues require a more specialized approach. For these topics, it's recommended you find a therapist who meets the following criteria:

Infidelity

Look for someone who says they specialize in it, and as a bonus also has trauma training.

Queer Relationships

Look for someone who says they specialize queer or LGBTQ+ relationships; experience is the name of the game here.

Non-Monogamy

Look for someone who says they specialize in non-monogamy, poly, or open relationships; experience is the name of the game here.

Sex Therapy

Look for someone AASECT certified.

Meet the Clinicians to find the right fit.